Wonderin...

Sometimes I wonder what is my purpose in God's big plan. I go back and forth on what I think that I should do. Whether going to bibleschool or just college or university is the answer. I'm 21 years old and what have I done for God's kingdom? Have I made a difference in anyone's lives or made a difference in the world at all even alittle?
I only wonder...
Then I also think God why did you let all my friends and loved ones move away from me? Was it to make me stronger,or to make me appreciate my friends that I do have now more,while I still have them around.
I do miss all of my friends *sigh*
I also have been thinking about my Nan...I don't really remember her a whole heck of alot.
But what I do remember is thats she loved me very very much. I can't quite help wonder if I would have turned out any better if she still were alive. My nan passed away 14 years ago this Dec 27th. I miss you Nan sooo much...
I love you ♥